Zookeeper Jokes/ Animals Jokes

One time, the entire class gathered around the cage and, in complete silence, watched as the feeding took place.

"I'm jealous of the snake," the instructor said. "I never get the class's undivided attention like this."

A student answered matter-of-factly, "You would if you could swallow a mouse."

When a squirrel slipped into my house, I did the logical thing: I panicked and called my father.
"How do you get a squirrel out of a basement?" I shrieked.
Dad advised me to leave a trail of peanut butter and crackers from the basement to the outside. It worked the squirrel ate his way out of the house. Unfortunately, he passed another squirrel eating his way in.

How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.

What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.

What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex. 

How does a pig go to hospital? 

In a hambulance.

What bird can lift the most?

A crane. 

What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone. 

What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old. 

Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end. 

What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop. 

What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat. 

What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo? 

Big holes all over Australia! 

What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it. 

What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny. 

What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad. 

What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck. 

What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else. 

What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats. 

What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.? 

The Presidential Seal. 

Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic. 

What bird can lift the most?

A crane. 

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